Recently I decided to work on judging again. I had already learned that judgments were opinions and not truth. I understood from experience that it reinforced separation and interfered with my awareness of oneness. I had even had the direct learning of how you could either judge someone or love them. That realization was profound on its own…as I realized that is how source looks at us. Source is not judging all we do but is focused on loving us. A very beautiful awareness. Unwittingly, I had considered judgment as “just a thought” – but I was to learn it was much more. In fact, judgment warps your energy flow.
The everyday moment that shifted my experience
In looking at judgment again, I had another unique experience. While having some construction work done, the man working on my flooring had brought his nephew along to learn. His nephew was not enthusiastic but was helping. I actually had space for his lack of enthusiasm – in fact, I understood he would rather be having a “good” time and could not see the benefit of learning a trade at this moment. Been there myself!
They needed just one more 2×4 and I had one in the shed but it had some nails in it and it would need to be cut with that awareness. The nephew got the task…I mentioned the nails to him…he dropped the 2×4 on the ground…rolled it with his foot toward the large saw…continued to use his foot to adjust it on the saw platform. Nudging it, looking at his phone, using his other foot to kinda straighten it. I became concerned. He wasn’t really being observant and his adjustments were not accurate and he was turning on the saw blade! In that instant – I thought in my mind, “You idiot! You are going to get hurt or hurt someone else – you idiot”
Everything stopped for a moment – time slowed down. I was suddenly aware of many things at once.
There was my judgmental thought (which many would agree with) and it felt so right! It was dangerous what he was doing after all! However, the judgment wasn’t dealing with the danger. It was framing him as an idiot. I could see and feel an energy coming from my body and it was surrounding him with aggression/anger. I felt it moving through me and thought – what do I really want here? My answer was that I wanted him to be safe and not get hurt or hurt anyone. The energy flow stopped as I noticed it.
I shifted my thinking to: “I support your safety and wisdom as you work.” Suddenly, the flow of energy was so much more dynamic!
Instead of a warped and aggressive pushing from my own energy; the energy shifted to support and surged to 100% stronger! It came into my body and flowed through me. The energy felt good to my body, it was so much richer and flowed at a totally different rate and did not attack him though it did surround him. His shoulders softened and he adjusted the wood differently and was mindful of what he was doing.
The realization – Judgment warps your energy flow!
I realized how judgment is way more than just a commentary of thought. It can also take a good intention and warp its energy flow. It depletes me of my own energy and baths me and others in discordant energy. Judging is such a waste of time and costs too much. This new experience was an extension on how to love others and did even more to include loving me. And, quite efficient on the use of energy! When you realize how judgment warps your energy flow and feel the difference- it is amazing! Being non-judgmental and continuing to pursue new levels of release is a gift to yourself.
Judging others reinforces our separateness from our own being and therefore reinforces our separateness from all beings. …
-Deana C
This is very insightful Deana. Your awareness to catch your feeling within you and be able to stop a moment and shift is an important lesson to me. My wish for others is for them to discover and experience this within them. You have shared an experience that points to oneness and I am very grateful for you!!!
Your pause on judging and then finding a loving energy and changed behavior has given me pause. Thank you for giving words to what happened to me this afternoon.
As I struggled to glove-up before entering the post office (which has glass shields, 6 -feet apart boxes drawn on the floor and masks on everyone), I dropped my keys on the seat instead of in my purse. After mailing my package, I realized “NO KEYS.” I had had a tussle with my daughter about my going into the PO and expected judgment from her.
With that judgment of her in my mind, my first inclination was to call AAA. Instead I chose to suggest to her I could call AAA if she could not come within 30 minutes or so. Imagine my delight when she hurried to bring my spare key and gently suggested that I only use a key to lock the car in the future (my pattern was to use the door handle lock buttons). On getting home, I put neon orange duct tape next to the door handle locks to reinforce a new behavior.
I locked myself out of my car at the gas station the other day. Luckily the window was down – however, the keys were out of reach for me. I asked the next tall guy I saw to please reach my keys and apologized for having to ask him during COVID. He was happy to help. At least we are both on the road again! LOL!
What an important topic for all of us. So true! Thanks you!
Thank you Deana for sharing your brilliant, and oh so extremely important, wisdom!